The Freebie Countdown

Puppy like yelps and squeals of delight echoed across the 360 filled room as the PR bod uttered those immortal words: "There’s freebies on the table." The pack of lean and goody bag hungry fansite owners clattered across the room, falling over each others wagging tails and making tired "Is there cake in them?" jokes to stone faced PR girls, jokes they’d heard a hundred...no maybe...a thousand times before.

A runt funsite owner is trampled in the greedy stampede and has to settle for the left over Rainbow Six Lockdown Beanie while his older brothers gorged themselves on as many free pens, t-shirts and keyrings as their mouths could carry.

A PR girl, green in more than one way, fled the horrific sight to hurl up her finger buffet and vodka cocktail in a nearby toilet while the fansite owners gleefully pawed at her exclusive Blazing Angels T-shirt.

Welcome to the world of the press event. Population: Thousands of grubby mitted, cheap, starving fansite owners and the occasional underpaid print journalist getting by on selling free gear to chumps on Ebay and complimentary HMV vouchers.

Now I’ve concluded my creative introduction I’m going to tell you what this "Freebie Countdown" is all about. I’ve been working in the Gaming Industry for a few years now and during that time I’ve landed myself a fair few freebies. Some of them good, some of them rubbish and some just not quite right.

Here is a run down of my top ten favourite freebies:
Coming in at TEN, and essentially one of the worst freebies ever to grace my mail box is Wings of War. Controversial to begin this list with a free game, none the less, Wings of War is the worse scored game on BXB with an appalling 3/10.

At NINE we find a Prince of Persia: The Two Thrones pen. Pens are the stalwart of any freebies collection. Without a selection of free pens, you are literally nothing. I own the following: A Tesco Clubcard Pen, an HSA pen, a Walls Sausages Pen and the aforementioned Prince of Persia pen. My life is like a rollercoaster chaps.

A Halo 2 themed press pass strap is at EIGHT. With a useful hook at the bottom, I was sent a good few of these utterly worthless freebies. Not only do all press events supply you with their own badges but they make totally pointless prizes for users who never attend press events.

The number SEVEN spot is taken by an Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion Calendar. It’s that exciting.

Prince of Persia Playing Cards are at number SIX. Seemingly unrelated in every way to the Prince of Persia series of games; they are still nicely designed - a solid freebie.

In at FIVE is the rather cool Xbox 360 pen that came through Phlashman’s door after we beat Xbox.com (and the rest of the world I might add) to have the Xbox Live Gamercard on our forum. It’s silver, it’s embossed and I want it so badly; I’d sell my mother for it.

Finding it’s way to FOUR is the beautiful Far Cry Instincts Beach Towel. One lucky winner walked away with no less than two of these at LAN 2006 and despite them being ideal Ebay fodder, these bad boys are great quality if a little small.

Respectedly ranked at THREE is Take-Two’s brilliant Serious Sam 2 T-shirt. The only gaming themed item of clothing I’ve ever worn despite being sent numerous Extra Large sized T-shirts. The only downfall is that it says Serious Sam 2 on it, while the just cool Serious Sam logo would have been fine on its own.

Earning it’s place at TWO place is a copy of Dub magazine. Kindly sent to me by my homies at Rockstar; how this magazine (clearly aimed at "urban" aka black people) would be any use to a skinny white guy from a small country town is beyond me. I doubt very much the 15 foot "rims" featured would fit inside my Vauxhall Corsa never mind on it.

And finally, stalking it’s way into the number ONE spot, like a charming rogue looking to chalk up another pretty filly is the amazing Far Cry Breath Mint. Not that I’m qualified in marketing but I’m really struggling to see where the brutally evolved, bad ass Jack Carver is going to require fresh breath in his jungle adventures. But who am I to question?

The dust has settled. The table previously bulging with freebies now lays empty, except for a half chewed mousemat that the shallow, fickle gaming media cast aside like another copy of the soundtrack to Outlaw Volleyball they just don’t give a toss about.

Welcome to the world of the press event.